Monologue by a married man: After five years of marriage, I can’t love my wife anymore

2022-07-12 0 By

My wife and I are the same age. During college, we went to different schools in the same city.Because we had an internship in the same company during our senior year, we got in love.The main reason: we were the same age, congenial, and decided to stay in the city where we went to school to develop our careers.After that, we went to work in different state-owned enterprises through campus recruitment, and rented a house near my wife’s office, and began to live together before marriage.With the appearance of buying a house after marriage and giving bride gifts to my wife’s parents, the feelings between my wife and I appeared some cracks, but finally, after some bargaining, the marriage result was formed.However, THE process of bargaining has become so tiring that I often feel that we are not brought together by love at all, but by a price tag.Even so, I still think, since married, then hold the mentality of a couple to manage our feelings.When my wife was in confinement, my parents were supposed to wait on my wife’s confinement, but my wife insisted that my in-laws wait on my wife’s confinement.The result: During those days, whenever I got home from work, my mother-in-law would start bossing me around, and more often she would sit on the couch in the living room watching TV.The point is, I’ve tried so hard, but my mother-in-law still calls me lazy and says my mother won’t even bring her grandchildren.Facing these unfair evaluation, I can only choose silence.Finally, when my mother-in-law came back to my hometown, I thought that the three-person world with my wife and children would stop for a while. However, after that, I still maintained the state of doing all the housework. In fact, it was nothing.This day has come to the fifth year, I suddenly feel very tired, in the process of running the marriage is very hard, so that I do not want to devote myself to it.The state of mind has changed, the nature of the wife produced antipathy to the move, so that I now often because of trivial things to the wife talk back, quarrel, and feel that I have not loved the wife, and even in my mind have the idea of divorce.In a relationship, in order to maintain the stability of the relationship, a lot of times people will comfort themselves, to be a generous person.However, when it comes to maintaining a marriage relationship, it will be a tedious process, because we need to consider the feelings of the lover, the feelings of the children, and the feelings of the parents of both sides.During this period, if both parents are not with their children’s marriage, or both sides of husband and wife in marriage life can show the attitude of dedication, and there is no money in marriage life embarrassed, then, would be relatively simple to marriage in the business, but, when a certain link appeared mistakes, so precipitation marriage life will be more difficult.Think of a word: society is very simple, complex is people.Therefore, in the marriage relationship if met selfish and double target person, really tired.Of course, when the habits of two people appear different, the same heart tired.Most of the time, however, life is just an accumulation of small things, and when the small things fail to reach an agreement, you hear the chatter and bickering.Say some common seemingly small things, but make people angry phenomenon: 1) there are some people clearly in the level of doing housework present a lazy state, but like to give orders to the other half, the key is in the other half of the hard work, he also choosy.2) The two parties do not agree on the level of food, some people like no hot, some people can not eat chili at all;Or some people like pasta, some people like rice;Or maybe some people like to eat meat and some people like to eat vegetarian.These seem not too difficult problems to solve, but because they are repeated every day, it will become a big problem. After all, food is the most important thing for people.3) Some people may think that frugality is a good tradition, so it is a bit extreme in terms of saving water. Remember, at this time, frugality should also be based on washing dishes, keeping clothes clean, and keeping toilets clean.As a result, some people only focus on frugality, while others feel that frugality needs to ensure the normal functioning of life, so that the two sides of the frugality level will be different.After all, frugality to the extreme might be stinginess.Found no, when the husband and wife in a lot of life habits level is not consistent, the same will precipitate husband and wife conflict, at this time if there is a parent fanned the flames, then husband and wife feelings naturally not where to go.In this case, although the disappointment of the marriage will appear at a certain point of the outbreak, but the factors that lead to their outbreak must be caused by the long-term precipitation of dissatisfaction.From your description of marriage, it seems to be something that seems relatively normal, but, for years, you have been in the denial of your parents and your wife, so you are a little angry, and do not want to wait on.They feel that they are living a life without dignity in the relationship, and naturally they feel that there is no happiness in marriage.It is a normal emotional reaction to have divorce thoughts in my mind at this time.Maybe when you share your pain with people around you, some people will think you are sentimental.However, my attitude is, do not persuade others to be good without suffering., after all, when we are building a relationship is not in order to prove that he has the ability to get married, to the world is not in order to prove to the world for a child’s ability, but the desire in a relationship that can form mutual support to resist some unexpected accidents, and two people living together than single life to be happy.However, when he is in the evaluation now hold feelings only grievance and depression, so now hold the existence of marriage for their own and what kind of significance?Therefore, about the cognition of marriage, we must trust our perception, if we are really unhappy in this relationship, then walking is the best policy.My advice: Have a serious discussion with your wife about your dissatisfaction with your marriage, and if she doesn’t make any subtle gestures, divorce.Afterword: infidelity is indeed the top harm between husband and wife. Giving birth to a child is indeed the most painful experience in a woman’s life. However, these pains are ultimately short-lived.Especially the affair: as long as the other party apologizes sincerely, and did not deduct the dog can not change to eat shit, I tend to forgive.However, when two people have too many different habits, I actually think we should divorce.After all, it’s really hard to change your partner’s life style that you don’t like when you’re in a relationship.Sometimes, when two people are working on a marriage, when they don’t agree on a lot of things, it can be extremely frustrating.This is the inherent mindset of people, don’t get angry because of the trivial things in life.However, repeated everyday behaviors that you don’t like about your lover will eventually become obstacles that you can’t overcome.When years and decades have accumulated too much dislike, it turns into a big complaint.Therefore, the right attitude towards marriage in the adult world is to be different and not to work for each other.(Picture from network, text and text irrelevant)